Wedding Wednesday #7: CEREMONY!

Good Evening!

It has been so difficult to sit down and put my full self into these posts as of late, that it has been weeks since the last Wedding Wednesday! I am highly disappointed in myself and only hope that you can continue to be patient with me as I transition back into blogging on a regular basis. I love it and hope that I can lend my thoughts and full self over to this blog more often.

ANYWHO! Today’s Wedding Wednesday is all about the ceremony! 

I know some people get married outside, some at an event venue, others at a courthouse, and then there are those – like me – who are married in a church.

1Our Wedding Day

We won’t get too far into logistics, but because Timmykins and I chose to be married in a church, there were rules we had to abide by. At first, the rules turned me off to this choice of setting. But I found ways in which to personalize it as best as possible, and it worked out splendidly. Timmykin’s father presided over the ceremony so he could personalize the homily to us as a couple, and he was emotionally invested in the wedding, so it was a very wonderful time.

On top of that, we were able to choose the readings, readers, liturgist, and music before and after the ceremony. Because we are not partial to church music, we chose not to have music during the ceremony. Doing this allowed us to make a few non-traditional selections:

The Skyrim theme song (this is a video game, and was strategically placed by my husband for when my brother first walked in. I am told the reaction was priceless
Favorite Things (Sound of Music) – what the wedding party walked down the aisle to
Climb Ev’ry Mountain (“) – what I as the bride walked down the aisle to
Skyfall (Skyfall – 007) – our exit music as a married couple “Let the sky fall…we will stand tall and face it all together”

If that isn’t a fun playlist for you, then choose your own! Seriously, it was so much fun to choose the music and so powerful to hear it played. Now I have those songs to connect with my high emotions from the day.

But my absolute favorite thing to personalize over the enter day – coming before decorations, food, music, everything – were the prayers of intention. There are guidelines to go by in the church, but I was ready to tailor them to exactly what we thought needed the most attention:

  1. For the Church and all of those seeking their vocations within it, especially Deacon Tony. That they find the fulfillment and joy in their work that they long for. 
  2. For all people. That we realize despite our race, sexuality, age, creed, and other unique traits, we are all made in the image and likeness of God, and that may bring us together and lead us to a greater peace. 
  3. For E & T. As they embark on this new and exciting journey together, that their love for one another may bring happiness to them, and every life they touch. 
  4. For those that are sick, and those that are unable to join us today, especially Baba & Granny. That they may all feel the warmth of the love radiating from this gathering.
  5. For all of those who have died, especially John S., Roy Z., Ruby Z., Bob E., Ron P., Karl S., Roger S., and Anthony B. May they enjoy perfect happiness and total fulfillment in eternal life. 
  6. For all of us, here today, especially E & T. That we may all carry on the legacy and best attributes of those who have gone before us. Those attributes including, but not limited to: courage, loyalty, compassion, and forgiveness. And that with these tools in hand, we may all live our most rewarding lives.

I had my mom read the intentions, and because they were very personal to her as well, she choked up. I don’t think there was a dry eye in the room.

2Not a dry eye

I highlight the majority of this last intention, because living out the legacies of my family and friends who have passed has become a major focal point in my life, and this intention truly came from the deepest part of me that I could access. We chose to make our big day not just about our union, but about the people who have supported us along the way, both living and deceased. So, basically it was just a big THANK YOU party!

4A token to remember…

3RELIEF! We are MARRIED!

Now, what are you doing to personalize YOUR ceremony? Do you tend to go by-the-book, or would you consider mixing in a few non-traditional details?

My advice? Do what makes you happy. There will be compromise between you and your betrothed, as well as family and friends, but ultimately it IS your day. 

❤ The RoaminTwin

 

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And It Is Perfect.

Aside

Standing in front of the 40 or so people at mine and Timmykin’s rehearsal dinner, I didn’t know what to say. I wanted to thank each person individually for all they have done for myself and for TImmykins as individuals and as a couple. I wanted to thank each of them for all that they had done for our big day. I wanted to let them each know how much I loved them. But I didn’t have anything prepared.

Honestly, I thought the words would come naturally, especially with this small group.

And at first, they didn’t. But then I thought of something that I could express to them all without being too wordy, or forgetful, or taking up the remainder of their evening. So I told them:

I have lived in Sacramento. I have lived in San Diego. I have lived in Kansas City. Through it all, I have always thought and said one thing: If I could be surrounded by the people I love, it doesn’t matter where I live. And here I am, with all of you. And it is perfect.

Of course, there was more said – after choking up and crying a bit – but that is the most important thing I could tell any of them. Regardless of their participation in the preparation and wedding itself, they are the people I love. Basically, who I would be OK being stranded on a deserted island with (I know it wouldn’t be without conflict, but I would choose them anyway 🙂 ).

Not everyone could join us this weekend, but I am oh-s-grateful for those who could. I just realize that it was as close to perfection as it could be.

Regardless of what I write regarding the wedding and all of its glory in the next days and weeks, if I could give anyone one piece of advice: appreciate all of the love and support around you on that day. It is the only time that all of those supporters will be in one room…supporting you.

It’s what I thought as I stood at the beginning stretch of the aisle walking into the church. All that stood between Timmykins and I besides this empty aisle were the people we know and love. The people who understand us, who love us, and who came to witness us at our happiest. Not only was it my day to shine in the most beautiful dress I will ever own, it was my day to thank those people that we love and to revel in their love towards us. Even those who couldn’t make it, I could feel them there in spirit.

Isn’t that just a beautiful thought? And one that has brought me to tears multiple times.

 

I would like to publicly acknowledge my family for all that they did in preparation (and in raising me, of course!):

My sister, my MOH. She stepped in and helped with so much! From bachelorette parties, to shopping, to putting together a lovely gift from the bridesmaids. She made our slideshow video, and put together a tear-inducing “Sorry-we-couldn’t-be-there” video from some of my favorites. She took care of me through the emotional ups and downs, and even split the duty with me of doing my hair and makeup! Of course there is so much more that she did, but I couldn’t begin to list it all here. Basically, she is the best person I could have wanted to be my sister or MOH.

My wonderful mother. She took the reigns on cookie and cake making (thousands of cookies, all of the wedding cakes!), she read our general intentions for us (another tear-jerker during the ceremony), she took me dress shopping and made seemingly thousands of trips to craft stores far and wide to find some of the perfect things for me. She fussed about making it the perfect day for me, and did so much, and I just love her for it!

My dad. First of all, he didn’t scare Timmykins off when asking for my hand in marriage. But he also did so many things, including last-minute runs to pick up 1,000 donut holes for the reception, chocolate covered tuxedo strawberries that I have wanted on my wedding day since I was a little girl, having a backup video camera (which was needed and GREATLY appreciated), and giving the most splendid father-of-the-bride toast I have ever heard – dropping a little knowledge along the way. Did I mention he was the best dance partner for our father/daughter dance? He always has been, and always will be 🙂

I guess I could thank my brother, too. 🙂 He makes me smile every day, and he gave me the strongest hug after the ceremony that I will always remember. That kid is growing up into an awesome, caring, and motivated young person!

I only hope that I can share the love and support that my family has given me, and will continue to give me, throughout the years.

Just revel in it, Happy People. Revel in it 🙂

❤ The RoaminTwin
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My beautiful family 🙂 PS-GOTTA love photobooths!