Wedding Wednesday #2: People & Party!

Happy Wednesday, Happy People!

Last Wednesday, I introduced you to my BRAND NEW blog series: Wedding Wednesday! 

It will always get the “!” at the end, because weddings are a big deal and so much fun as a guest OR guest-of-honor!

This week, we continue with Wedding Wednesday #2: People & Party! This is a fun one that – as you will see when we delve into this post – you can start to work on before you are engaged (heck, even before you are in a relationship!). Sound a little crazy? Well, face it, some of us have been dreaming about this day our entire lives. We might as well get as many details in order as possible beforehand!

When I was a senior in high school, we had a marriage class for the portion of the year. In this class, we also had to plan a wedding. We were paired up, drew a budget out of a hat, and had to do research on numbers, vendors, etc. to plan this wedding together within our budget. My partner and I received a budget of $25,000 (generous, in my mind – and well over what we spent for our wedding). One of our first items-of-business was to each create a guest list for our own ideal weddings. Because we were two completely different people with no mutual friends or loved ones, we really had to prioritize and cut our lists down to meet budget.

Well, I kept my original list. It had 300 people on it, that if I were to have gotten married in 2008, I would have liked to invite. Over the years, I cut people and added others, but I always kept that file on my computer. And it REALLY helped when planning my actual wedding came along! Knowing that Timmykins was who I was going to marry BEFORE he proposed also helped, because I was able to start adding his family and non-mutual as well as newly-mutual friends to the list before the nuttiness of the planning process began. It was really nice to have a general idea (no-so-nice that our original number was close to 400, YIKES!).

I had mentally been doing the same thing when it came to the wedding party years ago. Subtracting people as I realized they were negative influences in my life, adding as I realized who genuinely cared. It’s definitely something that’s nice to have figured out beforehand.

So, that is just the beginning! Below, you will find my top tips for perfectly planning the people part of your party!

Always have your wedding party in mind. Write it down if you have to! Realize it doesn’t have to be too large, and one partner’s side of the altar does NOT have to match the other’s. We went with 7 bridesmaids, 7 groomsmen, 2 ushers (one of my best guy friends, and another friend of his), 1 flower girl, and 1 ring bearer. Your numbers could differ drastically!

Who else will be a part of the ceremony? This is a HUGE event in your life, and you want to choose people wisely. I didn’t just want any ole priest performing the ceremony, especially one that didn’t know us as a couple. I wanted someone who would be able to speak true to our relationship. Good thing for us, Timmykin’s father is a Deacon, and his mother is the wedding coordinator at a nearby church. CHECK! We also needed 3 readers. We could have asked anyone, but I was honored to ask my mom to be a bigger part of the ceremony by reading, as well as my second mom to read another, and one of Timmykin’s sisters to read the third (he has 5 sisters). All of this really helped us wrap our heads around a general church wedding and personalize it as much as we could.

Who do you want there? We wanted 400 people there, but it just wasn’t feasible for us (always kept a budget in mind, and did what we could to include as many guests as possible). It was important for us to have our families and closest friends there to witness and celebrate our love for one another. We both have large families. We also have many people who have shaped our lives. We went back and forth for 8 months following the proposal on who we HAD to cut (it was painful!), and ended up inviting WAY more than originally anticipated, but really really wanted those people to be with us. In the end, around 100 RSVPd NO, and things were back in our ideal numbers, but we still wish everyone could have been in attendance!

Note: If there is someone on your guest list that you do NOT feel this way about, someone that gets on your nerves, or is negative, or you just don’t feel that they have been a big part of your life, don’t invite them. It’s your day. –And I know people will tell you over and over again that it is your day, and still try and force ideas on you, but ALWAYS remember that IT’S. YOUR. DAY. Make it one of the most happy and carefree days of your existence 🙂

Goodness, this post feels like another rant, but I just feel so strongly about starting your guest list and ceremony participant list EARLY so as to make the process much easier on you. Waiting until the last minute causes unnecessary stress, as well as – potentially – regrettable decisions. Regretting inviting the wrong person, or not inviting someone who is really important to you. Same with the wedding party: including someone who is just not a positive influence in your life, someone out of obligation, etc. Plus, early planning means you can ENJOY THE ENGAGEMENT that much more!

Because, truly, it is about you, your future, and your happiness.

Stay tuned for next week’s Wedding Wednesday: Theme! – or something with a better name 🙂

And, as always, have a Happy Day, Happy People!

❤ The RoaminTwin
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Our Wedding Party: some of our favorite people, and we wouldn’t have it any other way!

 

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Wedding Wednesday #1: You’re Engaged!

Welcome to my few week (I can’t determine the amount of weeks this will take, because I am adding and subtracting as I go!) blog series: Wedding Wednesday! Here, you will find tips, tricks, and advice from the newly – and most importantly, HAPPY – me, RoaminTwin! Oh, and if you are a future Kansas City bride or groom, you will also be getting vendor suggestions! YIPPEE! Now, off to the races, here’s Wedding Wednesday #1: You’re Engaged!

Congratulations!

If you are anything like me, you were chompin’ at the bit, impatient to be proposed to. For the 6 months prior, I had been repeating the words, “You can propose now” to Timmykins once per day. And yet, when it happened, it came as a total shock! Every time that I repeated those words, his response was “Soon”. I had grown to DREAD the word.

Evidently, he planned on proposing right after I told him that on the day he did propose, but the timing wasn’t quite right, and he replied with his expected “Soon”. When he did get down on one knee, I thought he was messing around with me until his pocket-fumbling led to a ring. A beautiful, sparkling, pear-shaped ring (which dazzled even more in the San Diego sun)!

Since we were on vacation, we spent the remaining week telling people in person, as well as calling loved ones not located on the West Coast, and just enjoying being together. I was excited then, and I continue to be excited every day as I look down at my pretty ring and think of the great adventure I am on!

You may not have this luxury of it happening while on vacation, but regardless of what happens, here is what you should do next:

1. Make sure that your loved ones know about your engagement prior to the news making its way onto social media. Call or meet with parents, siblings, extended family, and friends first. No one wants to find out that their best friend or granddaughter got engaged via FACEBOOK! This took a little patience on our end, trying for days to hide my ring in any pictures on our California adventure while attempting to reach so many extended family members. But it IS doable! Trust me, you won’t regret it!

2. Create a joint wedding email address. Yes, it may sound silly to some (and like you are losing your individuality to others), but it is extremely important. Chances are, one of you will stay more on top of wedding planning, but you will want the other involved as well. This email address can be used for group emails to the wedding party and other guests, vendor inquiries, contest entries, and can serve as a means of RSVP for showers, parties, and your actual wedding (but more on that later)! Make it something easy to remember by both partners, as well as something easily remembered by those who will be emailing it. Initials work great, as do numbers that represent year met, year and/or date of wedding. It streamlines everything wedding. TIP: ONLY use this email for wedding and honeymoon-related things while the planning is being done! It will keep confusion from arising, and you won’t lose important emails in a huge jumble!

3. Attend all bridal shows, and sign up for all bridal contests and emails. This is another instance where a joint wedding email address comes in handy, because if you don’t want to unsubscribe to all of the wedding “junk” after the wedding, just save what’s important and delete the account! But, back to the point: there are so many events for all types of vendors, and there are ALWAYS chances to win things, as well as get discounts and free swag! Yes, it could take a couple of hours out of your Saturday, but it is well worth it. Make sure to sign up for your local division of “The Knot”, and Google other wedding events. Map them out. Find designs and spaces and food you never even thought of! And always remember to…

4. Enjoy being engaged. This is something I was told early on and really took to heart. It was a nice reminder as we decided to go to bridal and wedding events – together – and found the planning process FUN and nearly stress-free. It was even a little mantra that, when reminded of it a week before the wedding, grounded me from freaking out in the last minute. It doesn’t matter how long your engagement is, this is the only one you’ve got. Just ENJOY it. Revel in it. Take it in.

And have a Happy Wedding Wednesday, Happy People!

Come back next week for Wedding Wednesday #2: People & Party!

❤ The RoaminTwin

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Food = Happiness

What?!?!?! But, RoaminTwin! That is UNHEALTHY!

I don’t LURVE food like I LURVE my fiance. I don’t put it on a pedestal, and it isn’t the end-all, be-all for every mood o’ mine.

Sometimes, though, food makes me happy. Not in the Paula Deen (shame on her!) down-home, comfort foodie sense.

It is a necessity for life. It makes me happy when I can feel it quelling my hunger. It makes me happy when I make good food decisions (if it isn’t the BEST BREAD IN THE WORLD, I am trying to steer clear).

Other times, it is pure enjoyment when I choose to eat what I eat. Enjoyment in the piece of homemade apple pie, occasional frozen grape, smooth chocolate custard, once-a-year Reeses egg…

I could go on. Because I love food. But I know what is good and what is bad for me. I also know what tastes divine, and what to savor every once in awhile versus steering completely clear of.

Because mom’s fresh, homemade cinnamon rolls remind me of Christmas day. And KC BBQ reminds me of home.

Don’t judge me.

What are YOUR guilty food pleasures?

❤ The Roamin Twin